An Honest Q+A
Grab some snacks and a drink and settle in! I thought I would do a little Q&A to sort of thank you guys for your continued support and love! I wrote it as best as I could like how I would speak so that it doesn't sound very article-y.
ABOUT MES
How did you improve your language skills for someone who didn't even speak the language?
My dad is a language teacher, he teaches Tamil, so when I was younger and struggling with the language, he got books from his colleagues and the school depository for me, he brought me to libraries and made me read the newspaper (which I particularly hated). I was a pretty voracious reader and devoured books so I think that helped too! He made me write out a summary and 5 words that I came across for the first time in each book - I was supposed to look them up in the dictionary and then create my own sentences that best capture the meaning of the word. In retrospect, I don't know if he fully understood the words himself either but that habit sort of stuck! As for speaking, I used to mimic what people were saying in my head. You know that thing you do where you say the exact same thing the person is saying, sort of like repeating after them but doing it at the same time as them? I don't know how to describe it. I used to do that. And it's because of this that my accent and style of speaking HEAVILY changes from one person to another even to date. My opinions don't change, mind you. But my delivery changes, like a chameleon, when it comes to speaking. I think this was because the English I read in books was fairly different from the English I heard around me and I just so desperately wanted to fit in. Is that sad/bad?
Guaranteed eye roll
People who make things difficult - Once I told someone you can DIY a face mask by mixing lime juice and milk and the person asked me if they should be using pasteurised or unpasteurised milk. That person was NOT joking. I can't stand it when people turn things negative or difficult for no particular reason! Like those people who leave comments under a lovely video of an adorable child singing saying "A child should be outside playing not singing indoors. It needs fresh air" If what you are saying isn't going to add value, don't say anything at all!
What does a normal day in your life look like?
I'm not a morning person! AT ALL. I wake up around 8 or 9am. There is an hour of yoga or workout followed by catching up with the latest episode of my TV shows (time difference, so we watch in the morning while it streams at night in the USA). Time until lunch is usually spent on my freelance work, or other miscellaneous work such as website design and social media. I also spend around an hour during this time to stay inspired if that makes sense - so I look at what other people (not restricted to bloggers and writers) are doing, Pinterest boards, Stephen Colbert/Trevor Noah/Jon Stewart clips etc. This is usually how I get ideas and topic sentences for my articles. 3pm to 9 or 10pm is when I perform at peak capacity so on Sundays and Wednesdays, I write my article around this time. Other days I work on my secret project that I'm not quite ready to share with you guys. Yet! Will do so soon, but I'm still pretty shy about it. You're just going to have to wait and see. Please and thank you.
Why don't you make YouTube videos?
This is something I've been asked since Day 1 of this website! For a lot of reasons. Like I mentioned before, my speaking voice is very different from my writing voice. So when I do a video and speak, you are not going to have my thoughts flow as "nicely" and things may not even be as engaging. A lot of material that I do is also very content heavy and I think YouTube is more visual - makeup, cooking, skits etc. So if I made videos, it would be me in my room, in front of a camera, just talking. Does that not sound boring? I mean, yes, I am what you call a "performer" (haha!) and I love interacting with people and all that but I still don't quite know how to connect the stuff that I write with videos. I'm not going to say flat out that I would never have a YouTube channel or make videos. Maybe some day but even then it would be an annex to what I am doing here and not the absolute deal. Also, I'm super self-conscious and don't know how you guys would respond to someone who looks and sounds like the Indian Minnie Mouse. Hee.
What smell can immediately fill you up with warmth? (besides coffee 🙄)
Woody scents! Especially cedarwood!
If you can only have one pizza topping, what would it be?
Spinach!
If people were able to walk around with an About Me, what three things would you want it to say?
Thendral is observant and makes funny narratives out of the most mundane of matters, such as a grocery trip. She goes above and beyond for the people and things she believes in. She is probably drinking coffee right now.
WRITING
How did you get into writing?
I have always felt the need to build a narrative of everything happening around me. I think I said this in my "Why I quit my 9-5" - I was the kid who showed up to the zoo with a pen and notebook. I didn't really mingle with people when I was younger either. I could talk your ears off but I didn't voluntarily go up to people and initiate conversations, I kept to myself. So I used to write about the things around me, just observations. And then when I would go back and read my entries, I thought they sounded pretty boring, so I started to try and make them sound "nicer" and more interesting. And now I write!
How long do you normally need to write an article and how do you prepare or research?
Ooh. Writing takes anywhere from 2 to 5 hours. If it's just a personal story, it's naturally faster to write. Slightly longer if it's an opinion piece, because I want to double check on things that in my head are a given. Self-improvement pieces take the longest because of the research and the work that goes into simplifying things and making sure my information is accurate.
Sometimes I have 5 ideas lined up. Sometimes it's 4pm and I'm still freaking out about not having a single clue on what to write. Ideas come to me from everything and anything - I asked my sister what I should write about one day and she said "Well, I just moved overseas for a semester. That's a change for me" And that's how "Metamorphosis" came about. The Greatest Showman re-ignited my inspiration and I thought "Oh, I could talk about inspiration." "Mixed Identities" came to me around 5pm the day it went out. I was upset that I had no idea what to write about so I flipped through my books, watched a standup and then thought okay it's getting late, it's going to have to be a personal essay which is the easiest. When I thought about "me", "Tamil" came to my head and then digging deeper made me remember that I'm an immigrant. 2 hours later "Mixed Identities" went out and now it's one of the more popular articles on the website!
As for the writing process itself, for personal stories and opinion pieces, I do a rough draft first, where I just type out everything in my head before I lose the ideas. Then I make things flow and better sounding and make sure there's a point to it - all articles are edited a minimum of three times before I publish. For self-improvement and lifestyle pieces, I do my research first. Standard Google fare but I don't research "too much" because I don't want the articles out there to sway my thoughts and my writing. For example with "Inspiration and Motivation" I knew they are two different things even before I started writing, so I did a quick Dictionary check, formed a few ideas from there and went on Google to see what people were and were not talking about it.
Do you have any writing tips for beginners?
I can't believe this is a question that came my way! Thank you, I'm very flattered. As an amateur, I think writing has a lot to do with perception. And if you have that gift, then just go ahead and start writing. Of anything you want. You might not like the first few pieces you write, but that's okay! I think writing is a lot like cooking, you will probably mess up your first attempt but if you keep doing it enough times, you will soon find your own rhythm and style. Just remember that what you think is your style, doesn't always have to be your style. If you read my first few posts, you can see how much my writing has improved and changed since. So just start, and let your words bring you where you need to go!
What's your go to music for brainstorming?
I don't listen to music when I'm brainstorming because I find it distracting! I do listen to music when I'm writing the physical article. But also not when I'm editing.
How did listening to various songs affect your tone of article?
I usually play Tamil songs, because English songs are distracting #bilingualproblems. But other than that, they don't really.
MAKEUP
What is one makeup item you cannot live without?
Mascara
Top 10 makeup products for brown girls
I'm not a MUA, please refer to them as they know such things better! But I also believe sharing is caring (HA) so I'll list 10 products that I think has worked pretty well on my skin tone, and my pigmentation issues (Recap: I have dry skin, am a NC42-45, have pigmentation around my mouth, my forehead and on my lips)
1. LA Girl HD Pro Conceal in Orange Corrector
2. NARS Sheer Glow Foundation - I'm using Tahoe right now, but I think I have to get colour matched again
3. BECCA Multi-Tasking Perfecting Powder for contour - I use Dark Golden
4. BECCA Powder Highlight - I do not own this but it looked magnificent when the Sephora lady put it on me!
5. Kat Von D Tattoo Eyeliner
6. NYX Eyebrow Cake Powder in Black - (My eyebrow hair is fine) Use the given brush and nothing else because you would end up with harsh brows otherwise (Would also recommend the micro brow pencil)
7. Tarte Mascaras - Like my eyebrow, my eyelashes are also fine and need some definition. Tarte's pigmentation usually helps me out with this. Check out Tarte Lash Paint in Tarteist!
8. Maybelline Super Stay Matte Ink in Pioneer - A good red
9. Colourpop Matte in Grunge - It's a nude/natural on me. Could be anywhere from a light pink to a maroon on you
10. MAC Matte Lipstick (Padmalaksmi collection) In Mittai Pink - It's described as a Fuchsia if I remember correctly, but I really believe it will work beautifully across all brown girls (even with lip pigmentation issues) and give you a unique shade of pink that suits you.
#notsponsored
PLACES
Your most favourite place in the world
I always say my home or my hometown Thanjavur. The truth is my head. I know people usually say "Get out of your own head" in the sense that that's the place filled with doubts etc. My head, is pretty much me at my core. Happy, positive, optimistic - it's a pretty awesome place to be. You could put me in the worst of the places but as long as I can regroup in my head, that physical place could turn out to be pretty lovely to me. Are you starting to realise how kooky I am?
Must-see museum that’s still on the list
Natural History Museum, London
5 places you would love to visit
I want to go EVERYWHERE but these are 5 places I would be pretty upset if I didn't see before I died.
1. Karaikudi, Tamilnadu (I KNOW! I still haven't been here)
2. Petra, Jordan
3. Marrakesh, Morocco (too basic?)
4. I want to do an ENTIRE Europe tour. Yes, the whole continent! Of course I want to see Paris and Rome but I also want to go to places like Hallstat, Austria, Obidos, Portugal and Andalusia, Spain. They all seem so romantic and lived in!
5. Zambia or Kenya (For a safari tour)
ONE DAYS
Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
An accomplished writer, surrounded by love and laughter. I have this idea of starting a shop that sells earrings, necklaces and other jewellery, made by women in Indian villages. And of course writing on this website! This website dies with me!!
What do you hope to achieve by doing yoga regularly and long term?
I think yoga is a way of life, it's a discipline. I'm interested in the psychological and spiritual aspects of it, as much as I'm interested in the physicality of it. So overall, I think yoga is an attempt in getting closer to describing myself with the term "yogi".
RANDOM
If there were people interested in learning Tamil, what would you tell them about the language (e.g. the difficulty, the beauty of it etc)
I just want to say I love this question so much! Tamil is as as beautiful as it is old. Even regular sentences have a lot of history intertwined with speech patterns and lifestyle from hundreds of years ago. Like most languages, you are not just going to pick up the language, you're also going to pick up the history and the Tamil people's way of living. For example, we don't have a "Hello", we have a very formal "Vanakkam" which is a greeting that comes from a root word that means "bowing down". This is not used in everyday speech. Most people acknowledge each other's presence by going "Hey (name of person)! Apparom!" which translates to "next". It's our way of saying "What's up!" Another phrase that's commonly used to greet, when translated to context, is "What are you doing on this side of town?" We also don't have the "F" sound. There are a lot of terms that don't translate to English well, and a lot of terms in English that don't translate well to Tamil. I think all languages are difficult to pick up in the beginning, but once you get the hang of it, it's pretty fun!
And that's it! WOW this was long! Thank you guys once again for all the love and support. It means so, so much to me. I have always considered writing an art, i.e., a work of imagination that resonates with people and I'm so humbled by all the beautiful comments you guys have sent my way since day 1 of this website. About how much you loved my writing, and how much you could relate to it. This is still very surreal to me. I'll see you on Monday with a new article!
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